Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Blow J*b Bob




This begins with my very first experience with a detox facility..(awww, cute - you always remember the first one) and coincidentally it was also my best experience at a detox facility. Not that this has anything to do with the story I will be telling here but I thought I would throw it out there. If you ever have to go to detox in Vancouver BC, Vancouver Detox is the best. Most likely you will get sent to Cordova Detox (lame)..even Maple Cottage sucks (so I thought at the time- but in the moment all detoxes suck, especially now that you can't smoke. When I think back now though - time in a detox facility seems like it would be very relaxing..minus the whole kicking heroin/withdrawal aspect).

During my first stint in detox...I was at a NA meeting that was taking place there and there was a big scandal unfolding amongst the "detoxers". One of the females that was in the detox at the same time as me was having a fit because on of the speakers at the meeting had been one of her old "dates". She referred to him as Blow J*b Bob.

Not just anyone can attend a meeting at a detox. You have to be approved and "they" have to be sure about who everyone is etc, because they don't want anyone coming in that is going to speak and trigger anyone or let someone in that will bring drugs in for the patients/inmates. (Oh, btw-it is fairly easy to get drugs into a detox...it is harder to find someone with such low moral virtue that they would agree to do it. But they are out there - there is always dirt bags willing to help you bury yourself.)

The girl that was having the fit was a total head case but in her defense she had every right to freak out. If this guy "Blow J*b Bob" was who she said he was, then his being at a NA meeting at a detox was so wrong in a million ways. Regardless if he was in recovery or not, if he was purchasing blow j*bs from a girl that was selling herself on the street then he was knowingly taking advantage of her in her drug addicted situation. Well, even saying it that way doesn't get my message across because most men KNOW they are preying on unstable/vulnerable women but someone in recovery - especially someone that goes to meetings to act as a support system for these type of females/people was committing even more of a social injustice than the ordinary predator.

Ironic twist that isn't so ironic: I knew this guy, "Blow J*b Bob" (now referred to as Bob) - he was actually a daily customer at the coffee shop I worked at. He had full on grey (more salt than pepper) hair, wore the typical flannel work jacket and had a beer belly. At this time when I was in detox for the very first time I had just stopped working there (coffee shop) and had yet to really commit myself to a life a prostitution and all the other bells and whistles that go along with that. So I knew this Bob guy, not by name, but I knew his face and I didn't believe this girl at the detox that was saying he was a purchaser of hummers from ladies of the night. I mentioned she was a head case and she did appear very flaky so I took nothing of what she said for truth or fact.

Bob recognized me at the meeting and came up to me and said some encouraging yet lovingly meaningless words after the meeting had ended. I ended up leaving the facility a few days later. I ran into Bob at the Safeway on Commercial and Broadway a month or so later. He said he was on his way to a meeting and asked if I wanted to come. I was totally gassed on crystal meth at the time and thought there was nothing I would like to do more than go to an NA meeting. So we went, we even had coffee after - I never mentioned the incident about the girl from detox. He gave me his number in case I ever wanted to do another meeting and that was that.

Next time I saw him (which may not be the same as the next time he saw me) he pulled over to the side of the road when I was (not so) inconspicuously working Cordova and Dunlevy. He pulled up in his pimp'n' silver Aerostar (gives me a rush when I give extra details - thinking that these people may get outed). He pulled up and as he had a girl already in the front seat, I jumped in the back. (I will not use her name because she was a nice girl and it is never our fault is it??)

I jumped in and he pretended think that I was just waiting for the bus, listened to my bullsh*t sob story and then gave me twenty bucks. Somewhere during the conversation between the 3 of us he told me that "she" (the girl in the front) was his "blow j*b buddy". BARF - ugh. I was thinking that I was glad I wasn't her - glad that he and I knew each other from real life otherwise he may think about doing that with me. (It was always creepier to be doing dates with someone that I knew from "real life" - unless they were hot/super awesome/super cool/hip etc., of course - then it would feel powerful knowing that they were paying ME for sex and the rest of the world saw them in a different way...) When I think about it now - he obviously gave me that twenty bucks as sort of a layaway type thing. I would know that he had money and he knew that I needed that money. And now, since he had told me - I was aware that he had "blow j*b buddies" (his phrase).

So the flaky weirdo from Vancouver detox hadn't been that flaky after all.

Obviously one doesn't have to be a genius to figure out that eventually I was one of the girls on Bob's roster of hummer giving females but I can't even express to you how different one guy can be from the next. Bob was low down on the decency scale when it comes to men that buy sex from sick females. He enjoyed taking forever to finish - he KNEW that we (the girls) hated what was going on but he didn't even care - he had total power and he knew it. He especially knew because he was in recovery. He told me all sorts of stories about when he was a crack head and how he used to sell dope and get people/girls/crack heads to do such degrading things for even a little bit of dope. At the time the stories made me laugh because he was such a prick back in his day but he played the role of converted drug addicted in the "program" (NA/AA) so well that I sort of forgave him. Except when it came to doing dates with him. He was awful to do dates with. I am talking like hour long hummers here...awful awful awful. He was totally aware that he was torturing you - but didn't give a sh*t.

He would always come around when you were super hurting or (rarely) he would come and get you and treat you really nice. I even spent one New Year's Eve with him - he bought me a bunch of heroin and cocaine and just hung out with me while I did it. Of course the next day when I was all f*cking sick I had to give him the damn blow j*b.

I heard** that he ended up getting messed up on crack again but I never believed it (maybe I should have - I had been wrong about him initially). It was probably true - I don't know how that could have happened though. He never asked me for any dope or made like he was even interested in it. I wasn't about to share either.

There really was a guy that went by the name "Blow Job Bob" and he was a total scum bag. One of the worst and a disgrace to the NA panel.

**You must know by now that when I use the word "heard" as in I "heard" what had happened to such and such individual- that I am not claiming that there is any truth to this that I had "heard"...I am relaying a rumor - fact or fiction, who cares? Not me.






2 comments:

  1. Uhhh- Bob was a vile pig, it's amazing now predatorial some men can be....

    ReplyDelete
  2. I am so glad you are reading and you are right! Most of them are...

    ReplyDelete